Sunday, February 21, 2016

My Love Story: Part 4

I know, I know - I promised that part 4 would be posted by Valentine's Day. I broke that promise. Both of my boys were sick, so this has been my first opportunity to catch-up on my writing. Now, where were we? Oh yeah! My first memory of Kyle was him screaming off the back end of a clown car style golf cart. Right.
Years go by after that initial meeting before we have our first date, but all these "hints" of Kyle pop up along the way.
Hint #1: David - tour guide and awesome human - refer to part 1
Hint #2: Golf Cart. 'Nuff said.
Hint #3: Chapman University Office of Admission
Look, Chapman Admissions is probably the reason I'm married to who I'm married to. Not only did my tour guide turn out to be a close friend of my future husband, my first semester at Chapman I get a work study job in admissions office where I get to know David better and where Kyle works after graduation as an admissions counselor. 
Hint #4: Disciples on Campus
Disciples on Campus, or DOC as is commonly abbreviated, is a protestant Christian demoniation that I was raised in. I held a leadership role in on the youth council in Kansas City that affording me a wonderful scholarship to attend Chapman. As such, I was pretty involved with DOC at Chapman. Kyle wasn't involved with DOC, but several of his friends were. The fact that I didn't see him or get to know him more this way is literally ridiculous and borderline insanity. How did we miss each other?!
Hint #5: Theatre Kids
Not only does Kyle have a background in theatre himself, but his friends did/do, too. I got to know Adam, one of Kyle's closest friends, during one-act rehearsals.
Hint #6: Greek Life
I see Kyle a lot at fraternity and sorority events on campus.
Hint #7: Associated Students
Kyle was the VP of student house the same year that I represented DOC, so I saw him at every monthly meeting.
Hint #8: Admissions - again - I'll explain this one in a minute
I believe love is a choice. Of course, there are feelings and all the lovey-dovey that goes into that, but at the end of the day, love is an act that comes from a choice to love someone. Not all choices of love are the right ones. I could have dated others and married someone else, but I know in my heart all along that God had a better choice in mind. I'm just thankful Kyle and I had the patience to wait for it.
Love has tricky timing. I'm not sure if I had noticed Kyle during all of those hints that it would have worked out. I was young, stupid, and totally unaware. I think back to those years and I can hardly remember being truly present for any of it. I have delicious college memories, but if I had advice for my past self it would be to live more in the moment. 
During my senior year. I was asked to give an information session for new DOC students alongside Kyle. We found ourselves in an empty conference room in Argyros Forum about 20-30 minutes before it was scheduled to start. I can't remember what we talked about, but I remember feeling strange. I felt drawn to this person. He was genuinely kind, compassionate, loved life - everything about him was incredibly attractive. It was also the way I came alive around him. I remember thinking that I wished I had dated him. I quickly pushed the thought out of my mind - I was moving in a month back to KC and then onto Washington DC for graduate school.
The summer and fall that followed graduation was probably the most tumultuous of my life. I wanted so desperately for another person to be as excited about a relationship with me as I was with them. I kept swinging for the "home run" and always striking out, but strangely I didn't care and it didn't deter me. God gave me dating grit. Haha! He really did. I just kept taking punches and running back into the ring. I honestly thought that each time I dated someone new that he could be "the one". This openness and willingness to get beat-up a little (metaphorically of course) prepared me for Kyle.
He had been through similar experiences, though slightly different. I'd never attempt to tell his side of the story, but I'll say that he had recently been "friend zoned" prior to our first date. He showed up to that first date determined to establish it as just that: a date. I showed up ready to jump head first. It was the perfect timing and combination of intentions that led to a very successful first date.
To make a long story a little shorter, I went home after our date and informed my sister "I'm going to marry him." To which she replied, "Yay! I'm so excited for you! Just never repeat that again and especially not to him."

It's true. I knew it from the first date. He was (and still is) my match.


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